How To Get Busy On The Beach
Getting down ‘n dirty in the sand sounds romantic. But with the risk of prosecution, sand settling where the sun don’t shine and overly friendly crustaceans, it has the potential to be a disaster. That’s why we’re here to help! Follow this simple guide to summer lovin’ in the sand.
Do some recon. Take a “romantic” walk down the beach to find the prime lovemaking spots. Look for secluded caves and inlets, remote dunes and sheltered grottos. You don’t want to be too exposed, as anyone who catches you is within their rights to call the police. Once you’ve found your “boudoir,” clear away litter, pointy rocks or driftwood, and return later with your supplies.
Bring supplies. And we don’t just mean protection! You’ll need a couple of towels to form a barrier between you and the sand (and to quickly cover yourselves if anyone passes by). You’ll also need a flashlight if you’re venturing out at night, a bottle of water for washing off afterward and a bag for the condom.
Check tidal reports. There’s nothing worse than finding your sandy love-nest suddenly under four feet of water!
Pick the right position. Missionary, side-by-side or cowgirl all make for exciting sandy sex. Positions like doggy-style are always fun, but if you’re caught, it’ll be tough to plead that you were just “cuddling.”
Avoid the ocean. Sex in the water may look attractive in the movies, but you wouldn’t want a repeat of the opening scene in Jaws, now would you? Plus, water sex can be awkward and uncomfortable–salt water can dry you out down there so you feel like you were canoodling with sandpaper. It also exposes your naked bodies to all kinds of wildlife. Stick to the shore!
Wear easy-access attire. Try elasticized shorts or a dress that can be hiked up–getting completely naked increases your chances of getting into trouble if you’re spotted.
Make it quick. The thrill of getting caught and being intimate in such a public area will probably make you both hot pretty quick. Now is not the time to practice your tantric moves. It’s best to enjoy a quickie and finish up with a smile than to spend the night in lockup thanks to your Kama Sutra for Dummies book.
As featured in 2life magazine!