Tabooze! And Other Drinking Games For Couples
You’re all grown up now. And it’s so lovely and refined to pop open a bottle of wine that costs more than $10, recline on a pristine couch and watch HBO with your significant other. But admit it—sometimes you secretly yearn for the university parties of yore. The days when seven of you could pile onto a brownish sofa that someone harvested from the curb, play wild drinking games and still be laughing as you puke up a combination of rum, cheap beer and peach schnapps.
Well, who says that devil-may-care tone can’t resurface every now and then in your relationship? All you need is some booze, dice, cards and these sexy ideas.
1. Cock Tales. Rapidity is not usually a valued trait in foreplay, but this is an exception: Go back and forth listing all the names you can think of for the male anatomy as fast as you can. The person who gets stumped chugs their drink. Repeat using the female anatomy.
2. You’re Faking It! One player starts vocalizing snippets of fantasies they have. It can range from nice (“Something other than missionary position would be fun”) to naughty (“Gimme an hour and I could show an entire football team how to score”). The key is to tell the truth, but weave in the occasional fib. If the listener detects that the fantasizer is lying, they yell “You’re faking it!” If it is a full-on lie, the fantasizer drinks. But if the listener makes a false accusation, they drink twice as much.
3. The 69. Take turns rolling a pair of dice, adding up the communal total as you go. The person who exceeds 69 has to drink. If you actually hit a perfect 69, um…hint, hint.
4. Staring “Kisstest.” Plant an open-eyed kiss on each other. It’s so awkward and hard to focus up close like that but…must…hold…stony…gaze. ‘Cause if you blink, you drink.
5. Blow Job. Balance a deck of cards on top of an open bottle of beer (or a glass that’s slim enough). Sit opposite each other and draw an imaginary line on the table. Give a signal and then blow furiously. The person who ends up with the most cards on their side drinks the beer.
6. Underwear Dare. On the count of three, stand up, remove your underwear as fast as you can, and put it back on over your clothes. Slowpoke downs a whole beverage. Now, take it off again and switch so you’re wearing his and he’s wearing yours. Last cross dresser gets a douse of booze.
7. Blind Mate. One partner is blindfolded. The other is naked. The naked partner guides the blindfolded person’s hand to a body part, letting only the index finger touch it. The blindfolded person tries to identify what they just touched. If they’re right, the nudist drinks. If they’re wrong, they are fed a shot.
8. The Jameson Game (We mean Jenna). Watch an XXX movie. Every time the male anatomy is mentioned, he drinks. When the female anatomy is named, she drinks. When someone says the F-word, both take a swig. If realistic, intelligent dialogue is delivered, drink the entire ocean.
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Image(s): Shannon Toth